I'm sorry

I'm messed up, i know this and have for awhile. I get upset over odd things, but only because it brings back reminders of memories that hurt. I remember words that once made me happy, to only have them as a constant reminder of how much of a screw up i am. I've been told things are my fault, yet the problem is... when the people come to there senses... the cruel words stayed locked in my head. I beg you not to describe an image of pain, for they play in my head night and day... I dream it at night and wake up crying and hurting like it happen to me.... I don't sleep much anymore the images play in the shadows... in the sunlight... in the mirrors... nothing makes the words and images goes away.... I've seen happiness.... but how long til he tires of me is the question. So yes, i'm messed up and i don't know how to fix the damn issue so excuse me for not being perfect for you.